Life coaching is not only about your life but extend this to how relationships impact on your happiness and contentment levels.
Relationships can at times can get neglected and taken for granted. Here are 6 reminders to take care of your intimate relationship.
- Identify what gets in the way of spending time together. Is it worrying about finances, is it work, is it a life packed so full there is no time for each other? Identify the what is missing in your lives together and holding you back from creating that special space and time for each other AND then together create the space for each other.
- Leave the Baggage behind – every person on the face of the Earth has some kind of history, or “baggage”,
although at varying levels. Do not walk into a relationship with your arms loaded with that baggage. The past is the past. Even though there are things from the past that are hurtful, and even damaging, learn from those things and come out a better and stronger person. - Realistic Expectations – no matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect. Be careful about putting someone on a pedestal, especially in the early stages of your relationship. Make sure that the expectations you have for your mate and yourself are realistic. Life change, career changes, people change and these can all impact on your mate’s here and now. There are going to be differences in opinion, and probably some disagreements. Also, do not assume that your mate knows how you feel or what you think about something. When discussing something important to you, ensure that you both understand the same thing. The reality is that neither one of you is going to know exactly what the other one needs.
- Start a memory box to store old movie tickets, brochures from cities visited, concert ticket stubs, old ski lift passes, cards attached to flowers received, old love notes or letters, birthday cards or anniversary cards from your mate, anything that the two of you did together. Every once in awhile, pull the box out and look at the
items with your mate. - Special gifts – these do not need to be expensive but a surprise gift to your loved one show’s you are thinking of them and appreciate them. For instance cook their favourite meal and dress in a sexy way, make a hand made card, or buy something that they have been wanting for a while.
- Appreciate, appreciate, appreciate – compliments and thank you’s can never be used enough. When he fixes the leak in the bathroom tell him he is handy with the tools, when she is generous to your mother then compliment on her generosity. Just like the cliché, “If you do not have something nice to say, then do not say anything at all.” This is very true – take notice of the good things your mate does and make it known to them that you see and appreciate those things.
As an Auckland life coach, I often meet with families and partners in order to identify passion, talents and skills and build new confidence in the life you are creating for yourself. Contact Allison Fisher | Specialist in supporting adults and teenagers in career and life choices for more information.
Life Coaching | Be Kind To Your Mate!